Is it possible to use the word ‘brunch’ without sounding like a pretentious wanker? I’m not sure I’ve even heard anyone say it in real life out loud but I’ve been for breakfast-type food mid-morning a couple of times in the last month at The Bistro at Lympne Castle and going for breakfast in a castle is pretentiously wanky enough without bringing the word ‘brunch’ into it too (if castles aren’t your thing, there are plenty of other places to get food and loads of discount vouchers about). Despite serving avocado on toast (sorry, I mean ‘crushed avocado on toasted sourdough’), The Bistro isn’t pretentious or wanky in the slightest and you don’t have to dress up like a dog’s dinner to eat there and ever since I ate their scrambled eggs on toast with spinach, tomato and seeds, I kept thinking about it. Unfortunately, I haven’t been able to go back to The Bistro in the last couple of weeks, so I decided to recreate their scrambled eggs on toast with spinach and tomatoes with my own vegan version made with tofu.
I know tofu scramble isn’t a new thing. It’s not even a relatively new thing. It’s probably been a thing since before I was born and maybe even before then but I’ve never been keen on scrambled eggs so there was no reason for me to try tofu scramble. Until now.
This tofu scramble is quick and easy. Except for the toast, you can make it all in one pan – and the nutritional yeast (nooch) and onion powder gives it a savoury kick not unlike the one you get from a packet of cheese and onion crisps. You may be thinking, ‘but why the flipping flop would I want my scrambled eggs to taste like a packet of cheese and onion?’ The correct answer is, of course, ‘because the world would be a better place if everything tasted like cheese and onion except maybe vanilla ice cream’ but, in case your opinion differs, just leave the nooch and onion powder out. You could leave all the seasonings out if you want to but it wouldn’t taste of much so I’d at least leave the turmeric in to give it that golden colour. The black salt (kala namak) is added to give it an eggy flavour and to stink out your kitchen for that authentic ‘I’m cooking eggs’ ambience.
When I first made this tofu scramble, I also had it with mushrooms, fried in the same pan but, alas, I had no mushrooms yesterday when I made it for the second time and, although I went to the little Tesco later in the day to get mushrooms for dinner, I forgot to buy them and bought a bar of chocolate and a packet of Oreos instead. Fate obviously didn’t want me to eat mushrooms yesterday. It wanted me to eat chocolate and Oreos though so yay for fate.
- ½ pack tofu, drained and pressed (I recommend the Tofuture tofu press)
- dairy-free spread
- 1 tbsp olive oil
- ½ tsp garlic powder
- ½ tsp onion powder/salt
- ½ tsp turmeric
- ¼ tsp black salt (kala namak)
- 1 tsp nutritional yeast
- ground black pepper
- 2 or 3 large fistfuls of spinach
- 2 cherry tomatoes, halved
- 1 slice bread
- Crumble/break up with your fingers or mash with a fork the tofu into a bowl. The texture is up to you - you might want big bits in it, or you might want small bits or a bit of both (I have a bit of both).
- Add the garlic powder, onion powder, turmeric, black salt, nutritional yeast and ground black pepper to the tofu and mix well.
- Heat a knob of dairy-free spread and the olive oil in a large frying pan.
- Add the tofu and stir, cooking for about five minutes.
- Meanwhile, place the cherry tomato halves flat side down on the pan to cook, turning over after a minute or so.
- Near the end of the tofu and tomatoes frying, add the spinach and cook until wilted.
- Serve on a slice of toast.